Early morning thoughts..

So… What I’ve learned so far since the move.. Even though permaculture is about building your food forest on a permanent location. Name kinda says it all. Now sustainability and it’s practices, use it anywhere you go..
When we got here, I was stoked to be back, but I’ve cried over losing my micro farm several times. I miss the dirt in my garden. I miss the sweet smell of it. I’ve started no seeds. I bought 2 tomato plants with a free aphid infestation. That are potted up and sitting pretty on the dock. I think we may add a jalapeno today. I can have a dock garden 🙂 my pear tree has no blooms, even though neighbours around block is.. :/ I think she may get some fish emulsion today. She had a banana peel the week I got here. My neighbours on closest side have 2 plum trees that are being devoured by moss, but they have blooms all over. I may go strip it today. Be awesome for some preserves! My neighbours on the other side have a lemon tree.  We have a lemon and lime coming. So we will def have more of an orchard than last time. I don’t have any of my brambles though. I can only hope the people who decide to buy our house in NC loves all we’ve done.
Sometimes I get sad knowing I’ll never have the garden or chickens here. As much as I love this family home, I still want the farm life. All kinds of animals, bees, crops everywhere! I dropping cowpeas today along fence. We still hold all our frugal practices very close. We have and want to. I never want to lose the act of humility. Doing things for yourself, not relying on others, brings a sense of that I never want to lose. Knowing where our food comes from with out paying ‘organic’ prices. It blows me away what they want for non antibiotic, anti hormone, anti real animal! Sheesh.
Once we get our routine back and Michael starts work, things will smooth out even better. Now we are waiting for his criminal background to come back so he can go take his drug test. We are hoping, HOPING, that it will be this week. It was almost 3 weeks ago Honda told him he was hired and he has still yet to start. I knew things move slower down here, that I have not forgot, but its the lack of southern professionalism that has me concerned. It seems they are flying by seat of their pants in his hiring process and we just really hope that it is not a show of the true work ethic held in that establishment. Soon though, we need all of us to get back on track with a way of life down here. Sydni is the only one with a routine! She’s doing great!! She got to go on the Jeckyl Island trip because someone had to back out and there is no refunds. So they chose her! I told her she had to be one the luckiest little girls in the world, she hugs me and smiles. As long as I’m with you, I am, she says…

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Dear Prudence.. Open up your eyes

ImageThis weekend I had the opportunity to go to the mountains to camp with some friends. So grateful for a few days of crisp mountain air, I was hoping for some clarity on some things rolling around in my head. All these new changes has put stress on my house and everyone in it. We know we are all doing the right thing and that it will get easier, but sometimes… it gets a little tense. Change is scary sometimes even for the right reasons. I wanted to get out of my own head for a day or two and see if I couldn’t gain a better perception, a simpler grip if you will. You can go through all the motions of anything and get it done, but if you don’t know why, you’ll never do it for the right reasons.

Example.. I can sell or give away all but the basics of my possessions to live a minimalist lifestyle. I know that’s what you do to get there, right? But if I deep down don’t want or understand a simple lifestyle, I’ll never be happy with what I have. The feeling of not having what I want or what I think I need to be happy will remain until I absorb the mindset of the minimalist. There’s the process itself and then there is the understanding.

I feel I really got some of the clarity I needed. Things became clearer than they have ever been to me. It’s all about being simple. I realized the answer is simple and beautiful. Doing for others because you want to, not because of a possible return. You have to get things right within yourself. Be peaceful and grateful and simple on the inside and your light will shine through. Wow, I’m in the middle of this epiphany that all I need is really inside me. If I’m good all the way through, I can handle anything that comes my way. To find that peace deep inside, you could be happy in a rainstorm. This is my life. No more getting angry or upset.  What does that do? Nothing and I realized how selfish that was. I control  my thoughts and actions.Helping other people, helping the environment around me.. These things in a constant will help me realize more the happiness that can come from within if I allow it.. No, not just allow it, but make more effort to repeat kind acts that bring happiness. I know this part is the understanding

Phone free? Are we ready??

ImageI went on a trip this past weekend phone free. Partly an experiment, mostly because I didn’t pay the bill on time and was mad at myself. Who needs a stupid cell phone anyway, right? I had actually thought about not going because I wouldn’t have a phone on the road. How stupid.. I don’t remember the road trips of my youth involving my mom on her phone half the trip with my aunt Susan checking us all in on Facebook every stop we made. I will make this trip an adventure. So the night before I Google the directions from the invitation, checked them twice and printed them out.

Check mark there.. What else did I need..? I had been thinking through all of my younger trips, mostly to Florida with us practically living on the Ga/Fla line.There were all these call boxes on the side of the interstate in case you broke down and needed help. I remembered seeing the same signs for the roadside service throughout South Carolina. Allright! Feeling better about not having the phone. I had directions, call boxes for the time I would be in SC and Michael reminded me to find a payphone if I needed it. I was smart enough to write down important numbers because I didn’t know them by heart anymore :c

Here we go!! I noticed right off I paid better attention to all of my surroundings.. Other cars, road signs, my own car.. No navigation means I didn’t know how many feet until my next turn. And you know, it really did feel good not knowing, telling Sydni we will be there when we get there. I knew about how long each leg of the trip was, so I took comfort in just driving.

First bad sign of not having a cellphone… The call ‘boxes’ I remembered from Florida weren’t in South Carolina. I knew I had seen the entering/leaving SC-DOT assistance zone or whatever it said, but I didn’t remember the boxes. Well, it’s because they are not there. The sign directs you to dial *HP from your cellphone. Not getting bad discouraged(thankfully I wasn’t in need at the time), but I thought, wow, how inconvenient for people who didn’t have a cell phone in their hand for whatever reason. Say they have the best coverage plan in the world, but if they have a dead battery and a dead car, they won’t be dialing *HP either.

So on trucking we go, following our Google directions to Milledgeville. This is where we ‘arrive’ in the middle of 441. Definitely not my aunt’s house. Not good. Still not panicking, this is an adventure, remember? I decide to head back towards down town to try and located a pay phone or directions. My aunt lives really close to a power station. If someone could point me there, I would know where I was.

Two major things different from my younger trips when we would occasionally get lost and needed a little help. There are no payphones left in that part of Georgia and most stores you stop at.. if they speak English enough to understand, very rarely can you get good directions.

The third store we stop at, I get the nerve up to ask a lady leaving the inside of the store to pump her gas. Between her and the man parked next to her, they proceeded to tell me where to go. The guy even wrote it all down on a napkin. Trucking again with our napkin and a bucket load of hope, we follow our directions til TA-DA we see the smoke stack of the power station within 10 minutes. At this point I know where I am and get right to my aunt’s with no problem!

The way home wasn’t bad at all. Sydni and I talked most of the way. She told me stories, we made up some together and just laughed. I wasn’t endangering anyone with talking or trying to text while driving which is always a plus! Though the concern of breaking down with no communication won, with us turning my phone back on when I got home, it really got me wondering, even if we were ready to go back to no cell phones.. Has the world changed so much that things would be that different? Is it really more dangerous to travel without a phone these days? Things are different. No pay phones at every store with a friendly clerk who could point you in the right direction.

I dunno.. Food for thought…

Weekend with my family, karaoke style :)

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So this weekend was my aunt’s 60th birthday party in Milledgeville, Ga which is just over halfway to my moms. Sydni(who is in the blond wig, stealing the show) and I jumped on the chance to get to see them before Thanksgiving, I have been missing them a lot lately!!

The road trip was great. Syd had her stuff set up in the back, we had packed a lunch and set out at around 9 Saturday morning. We printed out our directions (which got us lost!! that’s another story!) the night before and felt really good about the trip. It was a karaoke party so we sang all the way there. I love to drive. Road trips help me clear my mind and I’ve got a lot rolling around up there these days so I looked forward it for days.

I thought about where I really wanted to go to build for awhile.. My mother and her husband sit on 10 acres, most of it woods, right on the Georgia/Florida line. As much as I have been thinking about my family.. Well it got me thinking, my mom is sitting on the perfect site. Would the husband agree to work out a deal with me on even 1/4 an acre…? Man, to be back near my family, red Georgia clay, a piece of land I might could share or work off.. This probably took up a good two and a half hours.. I’ve never thought of really going home before until recently. It wasn’t that I had forgotten about that land, just never thought about it. I could build at the back of the property to where they wouldn’t know we were there. There is a road that goes down along the property so there is even a different access point. I decided to put the bug in mom’s ear. Who knows? Her husband may say no to my cob house idea on their property..

It’s just.. I love my family. We have always been really tight and when I moved Sydni and I to North Carolina last year, I felt like there a hole that would never fill up. I thought it would get better over time, but as we gradually get to a more simple lifestyle I realize how much further away I really am from them. I mean I drive a bike now for the most part and gas is so high. I just feel like the tear will become permanent with a homestead and do I want to be that far away??

Plus all that free labor 🙂 My little brother would love to help us build with cob. I think it would even help him reconnect with himself. I thought about cobbing in general.. Mushing the cob, making loaves, packing them on and smoothing out the clay with wet hands filled with the life of this earth. My spirit is longing to start. When we go down for Thanksgiving I will talk to Jay and hopefully look at the land!! I really could have my place there. It can happen 😀

Early wakeups..

I know people who never seem to have enough time in their day. Oh, how they could get this project done or spend more time with kids instead of handling daily chores when you come home. What if you could wake up a little earlier. Start small and before you know it you have an hour to yourself in the silence of the early morning. I personally feel one needs to ground themselves first thing of the day, so no matter what comes along, they are able to find and hold their center because they were just there that morning. Practice clearing your mind, listen to the house noises, this is your stolen time.. Find a spot in your mind where you can just sit, no conversations to keep up..
After go through some events from yesterday. You can picture them clearer, think about them now. Think about yesterday’s events, embrace the proud moments.. what was about that moment that made your heart swell. Can we do it again today? Think, was there a point you got angry frustrated? What action do you think bothers you the most? Is there anything you can do better next time?
I’ve started a journal. It was for blogs while away from home, but has turned into a powerful tool. I go to those pages and spill my beans. The sometimes edited version hits here. But it helps so much. Even if I don’t have anything to say and draw peace signs in the roots of cypress trees. (My favorite picture in my mind)
So find that hour or even 30 minutes that’s just yours, listen to your breaths, really try to clear your mind even of the best intentions and find yourself.

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