I’ll pass on my vegetables, I had Valium for dinner.

So yeah, there are those days. Days where I don’t feel the universal pull of my hippie vibes. I don’t want to pull weeds or go on a hike (between us I really could use a little more hiking) I want to stop trying to teach my children the reasoning and respect of not talking back and just smack ’em. Lesson learned, old school..

There are the days were I think I could trade my hoe in for a sweet pair of stilettos and proceed to rule the world without chicken shit on my shoes. Go get back that sleek, shiny car that made ya feel cool when you pulled in. There are just those days for me sometimes. And I feel guilty whenever I find myself thinking like that, thinking, oh hell.. what am I doing? Go get a job hippie, this would be easier with more money. Of course it would, but that’s not the point here. Not to this lifestyle. I feel you don’t learn anything about anything, especially yourself, paying others to do the jobs you can most likely do yourself. And if you can’t YouTube is a wonderful thing. To know the satisfaction of solving a problem with your hands, brain and whatever resources you had available.. Shit you feel like MacGyver, but like a hippie MacGyver because you’re helping your land not diffusing a bomb most times.

I mean really, would you rather be telling someone how you paid $2500 for your rock patio.. or.. how you and your family rock hunted for a year for this project, bringing home rocks from vacations with stories behind most of them. Then how you all puzzled it together piece by piece into the badass patio you’re standing on today. I know which story I’d rather hear and it would definitely involve vacation rocks.

So yeah I like to vent once and a while, the headline does say ‘our path to sustainable living’ path being key here. I mean you can go through with all the actions which is completely different than the understanding and respect of why, why am I doing this. It’s up to me to link the two. I can farm all day everyday, but to be happy doing it all day, everyday is a practice as well.

I think about my favorite movie, Humboldt County, where Rosie says, “When a lot of shit happens and your life changes and you find yourself standing outside on a cliff, Going, “well, okay, now what?” I feel as I have stood on that cliff wondering that for too long. I know this path is our Now What. I just have to remind myself sometimes 🙂


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